I discovered that there were 10 seasons of Law and Order: SVU streaming on Netflix about three days after you died. This would turn out to be a life-changing realization, as SVU kind of saved my life. I literally did nothing but watch episode after episode of this show for six weeks straight. We're talking like 10 episodes, eight hours (sometimes more!), every single day. I'm convinced it's the perfect show for any new babyloss mom. Seriously, they should start sending bereaved mothers home from the hospital with a couple seasons. Here's why:
1) There are no babies.
2) There is no real long-term plot (each episode is its own complete, stand-alone little story) to follow along with. So if you happen to zone out, or cry your way through an episode or two, you won't be missing anything.
3) You get to watch really bad things happen to other (fake) people, and in a sort of sick and crazy way, this is comforting.
4) The good guys always win, and the bad guys always pay for their crimes. When everything else in your world has just turned to chaos, it's nice to escape to a world where everything just makes sense, where justice and fairness rules.
Eventually, I ran out of SVU episodes (much to your father's relief!), and moved onto my new show: Rescue Me. This show was still nice and dark (you know, big dangerous fires, death, 9/11, all that good stuff), but was also hillariously funny. I wasn't in the mood for 'funny-funny' yet, but was definitely up for some good black humor by this point. Rescue Me also had much more of a larger plot to follow, and characters to become invested in. There were even a couple babies thrown into the mix, and I could handle it.
Now, I'm onto Bones. This show is actually kind of dumb, I know, but I've become completely obsessed with it. There's still the grisly crime element there, but it's a lot lighter than anything I've gotten into thus far. And really, I only watch it for the cuteness between the two leads anyway. It's like a reallllly long romantic comedy. It's interesting to me that six months ago, I wanted nothing to do with lighthearted happy...anything, and now I am at a point where I am 'oohing' and 'awwing' over two fictional characters, rooting for them to finally get together. I want these (fake) people to find happiness.
I've got about a season and a half to go before I'm out of Bones episodes. Then who knows what I'll find to waste my time watching. At this rate, I could be onto A Baby Story before you know it! :)
So often I feel like I'm stuck, like I'm not making any progress. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am moving forward, in so many ways. All the way down to my silly TV show choices.
I love you, baby.
Makes the Missing Lighter
1 hour ago