Wednesday, November 17, 2010

From SVU to Bones: a Timeline of Healing

Dear Stevie,
I discovered that there were 10 seasons of Law and Order: SVU streaming on Netflix about three days after you died. This would turn out to be a life-changing realization, as SVU kind of saved my life. I literally did nothing but watch episode after episode of this show for six weeks straight. We're talking like 10 episodes, eight hours (sometimes more!), every single day. I'm convinced it's the perfect show for any new babyloss mom. Seriously, they should start sending bereaved mothers home from the hospital with a couple seasons. Here's why:
1) There are no babies.
2) There is no real long-term plot (each episode is its own complete, stand-alone  little story) to follow along with. So if you happen to zone out, or cry your way through an episode or two, you won't be missing anything.
3) You get to watch really bad things happen to other (fake) people, and in a sort of sick and crazy way, this is comforting.
4) The good guys always win, and the bad guys always pay for their crimes. When everything else in your world has just turned to chaos, it's nice to escape to a world where everything just makes sense, where justice and fairness rules.

Eventually, I ran out of SVU episodes (much to your father's relief!), and moved onto my new show: Rescue Me. This show was still nice and dark (you know, big dangerous fires, death, 9/11, all that good stuff), but was also hillariously funny. I wasn't in the mood for 'funny-funny' yet, but was definitely up for some good black humor by this point. Rescue Me also had much more of a larger plot to follow, and characters to become invested in. There were even a couple babies thrown into the mix, and I could handle it.

Now, I'm onto Bones. This show is actually kind of dumb, I know, but I've become completely obsessed with it. There's still the grisly crime element there, but it's a lot lighter than anything I've gotten into thus far. And really, I only watch it for the cuteness between the two leads anyway. It's like a reallllly long romantic comedy. It's interesting to me that six months ago, I wanted nothing to do with lighthearted happy...anything, and now I am at a point where I am 'oohing' and 'awwing' over two fictional characters, rooting for them to finally get together. I want these (fake) people to find happiness.

I've got about a season and a half to go before I'm out of Bones episodes. Then who knows what I'll find to waste my time watching. At this rate, I could be onto A Baby Story before you know it! :)

So often I feel like I'm stuck, like I'm not making any progress. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am moving forward, in so many ways. All the way down to my silly TV show choices. 

I love you, baby.



Rhiannon said...

It is so interesting how we can see the changes in ourselves and our grief over time. Here's to hoping that you are onto your OWN baby story really soon! Hugs!

Trena said...

♥ ((hugs))

Tiffany said...

thx for the show recommendations :) i hope some time soon i can feel as though i am making real progress. ((hugs))

Jus and Kat said...

Even now, I still can't do A Baby Story sometimes. One wrong line from a parent, and I go off the deep end!

Kat @ In Dylan's Memory

Holly said...

haha I love Bones!

Jessica said...

I have only ever watched one episode of SVU - when Jennifer Love Hewitt was on this year - that was a good episode! I am seriously obsessed with Little House on the Prairie LOL - over 6 seasons in right now!

Lucid Anne said...

As you know, SVU helped me through as well. Then X-files. : ) (Watched for the romance.) Now House. <3

Side note- how did you feel watching the episode with Stabler's wife and the car accident? I know I saw that one like 1 week before Valentina died... I would have had a freakout if I saw it AFTER losing her. :\

rebecca said...

I also LOVE SVU, such a good show!

Jenny said...

I have always loved SVU but girl, Bones is my absolute FAVE!! My husband and I are almost finished with season 4 and can't wait to start 5...while watching 6 each Thursday, of course :)

I'm happy to hear that things are "lightening" up for you. You're an inspiration to many babyloss moms I know, but to me too...a non-babyloss mom who just really admires and appreciates your strength.

*BIG hugs*

Lilly's Mom (Desiree) said...

lol we are still stuck on SVU. :) Especially since the new season started a while back! Though...we have ran in to a few that were "baby-based".

Angie said...

LOVE SVU! We watched Arrested Development in the weeks after losing Aiden, now we're obsessing over Californication. It's funny how being completely enthralled in a silly tv series let's you escape for a little while.

Michele said...

The Tudors... Rome... These shows saved me until the babyloss came in and I was caught totally off guard. I actually never did finish the 2nd season of Rome. 2 episodes. Couldnt watch them then; cant watch them now.

Amazingly enough, I watched a lot of the History Channel. A LOT.

And, with Bobby and Maya, while pregnant and then later at home while they were in the NICU, in the moments I couldnt sleep and wasnt there, we watched and fell for Psych. It was what we needed to lighten the load...

Kelly Jean said...

We're loving Dexter, Weeds and The Walking Dead (Showtime, Showtime, and AMC -- the latter being brand new and in it's first season). I love Bones (David Boreanaz mostly ;D and SVU -- LOVE SVU), so maybe you'd like the above as well. <3 <3

Kerri said...

We're obsessed with Bones too. And Dexter. And Weeds... and House.

Just to reaffirm what others have said.

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to stop by, Kristin, and tell you I'm still following you. Although we are in two different places in life now, you will always be one of my fellow August Birth Board moms. Motherhood is forever. I catch up on your blog often and want you to know that my heart will forever go out for you. I think of Stevie often and wish that you were on there now, posting her 3 month old pictures, so we could all say how much she looks like you, or her daddy. Much love to you. And please know, I'm here. -Chelsey (chelseywhitfield from BBC August 2010 BB)

Anonymous said...

Hi, Kristin.

Just wanted to notify you of a blogger that has stolen this post. The blogger copied the entire post and did not attribute it to you.

Here is the link to the offending post:
http://atimeline-blog [dot] blogspot [dot] com/2010/11/from-svu-to-bones-timeline-of-healing.html

It seems to be a spam blog that's stealing posts from many different blogs. You can click on the Report abuse button at the top to notify that it's a spam blog.

Amanda said...

I love you Kristen, just for being awesomely amazing. I don't feel uncomfortable saying that at all.

Amanda said...

Just to reiterate what Chelsea said, you will always be an August Mom, because no one can take that away from you. You are now a Mom before you're anything else. The BL title before just makes you stronger than any of us. I still follow you regularly and I admire you, even though your position is not admirable. You're amazing, and I hope someone reminds you of this every single day.

Lori said...

Always been a fan of SVU and mainly for that reason of just and fair...even before Matthew was good (though hard to get through sometimes!) to see that justice DID happen. For some.

Caught myself being able to handle NICU this summer...barely, but I could...and this morning, even was able to watch a few minutes of Birthday (after the baby girl was brought home, and more for the drama that was out to ensue from the mother-in-law's visit, but still...) and I agree...even in our ability to watch different tv shows, our progress in all of our 'new normal' is so easy to discern.

Lots of love!

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