After Stevie died, I literally didn't think I would, or could, ever be happy again. I was never actually suicidal, but I do remember sobbing in bed one morning and saying to my mom, "I just don't want to be here without my baby." When I pictured the future, all I could see was infinite sadness. Emptiness.
But somehow, someway, I found my way out of the darkness. Long before Elliot was born even, I was able to find the joy in life again. But I truly don't believe I would have been able to do that without the support of other women who had lost a baby like me.
That's why I am so, so excited to be a part of a new online magazine called Still Standing. Put together by the amazing Franchesca from Small Bird Studio (who has done all my blog designs!), Still Standing is going to be an awesome resource for women who have lost a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant loss, and/or have struggled with infertility. I am proud to be one of 16 writers who will be contributing to the magazine every month. I am incredibly excited to have a place to share this new stage of my journey--parenting after loss--and hopefully make some new connections and friends along the way.
The tagline for Still Standing is 'embracing life after loss and infertility.' I love that its not just surviving, or living, but embracing life. Not just learning to live again, but learning to live even better than before.
The magazine officially launches tomorrow (Fran's daughter's birthday in heaven, and just three days before Stevie's second birthday!), and I hope you will join us! You can find us on facebook here, or click the picture below to sign up for the newsletter.
Love you all,
Kristin
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5 comments:
Amazing! I'm so happy for you. For finding joy again and for being able to share what you've experienced and are experiencing. <3
You are such an inspiration to women who have dealt with loss.
Yes, yes!!! Even BETTER...how that can be? Just unreal...but true. Able to embrace it ALL and be so grateful to still stand! Love to you friend!!! xoxo
Kristin, Stevie is beautiful...thank you for sharing her story to help others. I found Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope 6 weeks after loosing my twins boys in December, at 22 weeks 4 days pregnant. I had returned to work and was overwhelmed with life -my sadness, my husband's sadness, missing my babies, this new life and people's awkwardness around me. The world truly felt like it was crushing me...and then I found you and so many others in the baby loss community...and I felt relief...and like I had made new friends, who I may never meet. I wrote my story to submit to Faces but have yet to do so - maybe that will be my goal for this weekend.
Congratulations on Elliot! He's adorable!
I'm loving this magazine!!! Sadly, it seems as though I can relate to at least one sentence in every single article. I'm so glad that you are contributing. :-)
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