After Stevie died, I literally didn't think I would, or could, ever be happy again. I was never actually suicidal, but I do remember sobbing in bed one morning and saying to my mom, "I just don't want to be here without my baby." When I pictured the future, all I could see was infinite sadness. Emptiness.
But somehow, someway, I found my way out of the darkness. Long before Elliot was born even, I was able to find the joy in life again. But I truly don't believe I would have been able to do that without the support of other women who had lost a baby like me.
That's why I am so, so excited to be a part of a new online magazine called Still Standing. Put together by the amazing Franchesca from Small Bird Studio (who has done all my blog designs!), Still Standing is going to be an awesome resource for women who have lost a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant loss, and/or have struggled with infertility. I am proud to be one of 16 writers who will be contributing to the magazine every month. I am incredibly excited to have a place to share this new stage of my journey--parenting after loss--and hopefully make some new connections and friends along the way.
The tagline for Still Standing is 'embracing life after loss and infertility.' I love that its not just surviving, or living, but embracing life. Not just learning to live again, but learning to live even better than before.
The magazine officially launches tomorrow (Fran's daughter's birthday in heaven, and just three days before Stevie's second birthday!), and I hope you will join us! You can find us on facebook here, or click the picture below to sign up for the newsletter.
Love you all,
Makes the Missing Lighter
1 hour ago