Thursday, July 8, 2010

2 months

Dear Stevie,
Today marks two months since you were born. It's a bittersweet day. I refused to spend it moping around because although it's been two months since you died, it's also been two months since you were born. And that, Baby, is worth celebrating.

So today we spent the sunny afternoon at the beach with the girls:

We went out to eat at one of our favorite restaurants with Grandma (Dad's mom), that had the most beautiful flowers outside:

We took the dogs on a nice, long walk around the neighborhood:

Until Foxy decided she was too hot and tired and needed her mama to carry her home:

And we spent some time on the deck, admiring all our growing pepper plants:

While we were at the hospital, maybe an hour after I delivered you and we had finished saying our "hellos" and "goodbyes," Dad insisted on walking to this little bakery down the street and getting cupcakes for us. I thought that was the weirdest thing and said to him, "I don't want a freaking cupcake right now. Why on earth do you want to get cupcakes at a time like this??" His answer? "Well, I didn't want to say anything, but I kinda think we should have something special to celebrate Stevie's only birthday..."

So, tonight, I also ate a delicious cupcake for you:

From now on, I think I will have one for you every month. I might be sad on every other day of each month, but I promise the eighth will always be set aside for you. For remembering your birth and celebrating your life.

I am so glad you came into my life, baby girl. I just wish you could have stayed.

I love you.



Ashlee G. said...

You take such beautiful pictures. That cupcake looks delish!

Mrs. Mother said...

I love the idea of celebrating her life each month on the day of her birth with a cupcake.

I am coming up on two years since Jenna died, and I want to do something to celebrate the fact that she was here, even if it was just for a short time. I am still trying to decide what to do.

Dana said...

I'm so glad you had a decent day. The part about the cupcake made me cry. You have such an adorable husband to think of that. I love your cupcake tradition. I might have to copy you and do that for Jacob.

Franchesca said...

Oh, I just love LOVE the cupcake story! How precious. I love that you can celebrate her life. Happy 2 months in Heaven, Stevie Joy!


Violet1122 said...

Beautiful, just beautiful - this whole post.

I know you've mentioned it before - but your husband is one great guy.

I'm glad today was an OK day, and that you were able to focus on Stevie's life and birthday.


Melissa said...

That is a sweet story - I love the photos!

Julie said...

your husband is brilliant. i feel like a horrible mother for not thinking of honoring kenny's one and only birthday.

i love your outlook of celebrating stevie's life and not her death.

car said...

I'm glad you could find a positive way to spend a very tough day. (Love the photo of the orange flower)

Danae said...

Wonderful pictures and a great way to celebrate Stevie's beautiful life. You have such great strength! I thought of you, Andy, and Stevie very often yesterday!

Erin said...

I'm so glad that you were able to celebrate Stevie's birthday; it sounds like you had a beautiful day! And, boy, does that cupcake look yummy :)

mommy4boys said...

I'm glad you enjoyed the day. It's so hard to do so. The twins 1st month birthday was horrible. I hope I can take a cue from you and enjoy their 2nd. And these are some great pictures.

Elaine said...

Happy Birthday Stevie!! I know your Mommy and Daddy miss you so much.

rebecca said...

What a beautiful tribute to glad you were able to celebrate her life in such a memorable way. She is so blessed to have parents that love her so deeply!

Anonymous said...

I am reading your blog after hearing about you on WCCO. Your are truely inspirational! I'm sitting her at work, crying at my desk, reading your letters to Stevie. I can relate in so many ways. I have had 2 pregnancy losses and am now currently pregnant (almost 5 months) and constantly terrified of losing yet another baby. I've been there with baby jealousy at Target, fed up at watching celebrities announce that they are "having a baby" on TV, and feeling that I will never enjoy a pregnancy or the pregnancy of a friend because you are so right, getting pregnant does not mean that you are having a baby. I too try not to be bitter, but frequently need to put things in perspective. I can only pray that this time will be different.
I will pray for you, that soon you will experience taking that special baby home with you from the hospital.
Good luck to you and your husband!

Nicole said...

I thought about you yesterday, knowing it was the 8th. I'm glad to hear that you had a better day and that you found a special way to celebrate Stevie! Andy sounds so precious and thoughtful, wanting to get a cupcake the day Stevie was born. From what I hear, sweet husbands like ours aren't always so easy to find. :) *hugs*

Maggie said...

I think that's so sweet of what your husband did to celebrate her birthday with a cupcake! And I like the idea of doing that every month. :)

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