Tuesday, January 12, 2010


Dear Baby,

I should probably start out by introducing myself. I’m your mom, Kristin (but you can call me “mommy”). Honestly, I really don’t feel like a mom quite yet; most days, I still feel like a child myself! Your daddy and I have been married for about 2.5 years. I’m 24 and he just turned 25 (the day after we found out about you, actually). One day we’ll tell you the whole story, but we met when we were just 13 years old at summer camp, and then re-met years later when we both ended up going to the same college. I was an English major (which will explain all the reading I’ll insist on later) and your daddy was a Physical Education major…in a lot of ways, we’re are very different, but it works. Hopefully, you’ll come out a nice mix of the two of us–how well-rounded you would be! :)

Your dad and I at summer camp when we were 15...he's the really tall guy in yellow, I'm the girl in blue with the awesome bangs

The two of us on a backpacking trip in Montana last summer

Your dad and I have always wanted kids. In fact, I’ve dreamed about being a mom since before I can really remember. If there is one thing I want more than anything else in the world, it’s you. Now, to be honest, we weren’t QUITE ready to try for you yet when I found out that you were growing away inside of me…

I was a few days late for my period (you’ll learn all about what those are one day), and was feeling all-around pretty crappy. I was exhausted and kept getting these horrible headaches, but I figured it was all related to being stressed out and tired from running our annual Adopt a Family program at work–basically, I was in the middle of my busiest/stressfullest week of the entire year. Exactly one week ago today, I decided to take a pregnancy test, just to “rule it out.” Daddy picked up a test at the dollar store (I was so sure it would be negative that I didn’t want to waste more than $1.00!), I peed on the stick, and to my surprise, 2 pink lines appeared. I was literally speechless for a minute or two, just staring at the test, my pants still at my ankles. Finally, I opened the bathroom door. “Andy!” I called into the kitchen, “come here and take a look at this! Do you see what I see??” He did see what I saw, and was probably even more stunned than I was. “Go buy another test,” I demanded, “maybe this one’s defective!”

I took 3 more tests that night, and all of them were positive. You were nestling up inside of me, whether we were ready for you or not. One week later, I still have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that there is a little human being growing and developing inside of me. According to the books, online articles, and even iPhone applications I’ve read, you’re about the size of an orange seed. It’s so amazing how everything about you–your gender, your hair color, your eye color, whether or not you’re allergic to peanuts just like me–is contained in a little ball of cells the size of an orange seed.

Even though we weren’t expecting you to come into our lives right now, we are so excited to meet you and to be your mom and dad.

Take care, little one.



PS. I sent some Chipotle down your way last night. How’d you like it??


Poor Lucky Me said...

I love this post and am so glad you started this blog for your beautiful daughter. You have such a wonderful history together and these memories will be so precious to you when you move through the grief. That's what I hope anyway...and we have to keep hope for the sake of our babies.

Post a Comment

Design by Small Bird Studios | All Rights Reserved